dark mattering in this spacing of time (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

dark mattering in this spacing of time

old man with your tin can
old man with your tin can
old man with your tin can
old man with your tin can
this feeling it rooted
it rooted all down here inside us
and it spreaded out wide
here’fore in everybody’s eyes
and them weeds from the seed that it feed
they growing callous and numb
wrapping up in the rags that us find
them that they sewd in here
by for us own abandoning mind
old man with your tin can
old man with your tin can
old man with your tin can
old man with your tin can
well us gone jes have to wait
for what it coming over yonder
‘cause here for us
there aint no other way
that my uncle willie he used to say
cropping ‘bacca everyday
he be snapping off the leaves
wit’his two big hands
and git’n into tomorrow
jes the best he can
say hambone hambone where you been
i been ‘round this world and i going again
hambone hambone now what you gone do
gone go one mo time so you can too
hambone hambone when this be done
just as soon as you give hambone some
i got me something here working
that ‘longs to nobody else
dont needs me nobody
but just me’n’myself
i can do anything
do anything what i choose
i dont need no drum
just need a new pair’a’shoes
i say hambone hambone what you gone be
hambone gone be who this is he
say hambone hambone what he this be
he be any somebody who aint this me
jes wanna!pull off! this shame
‘cause it too dark like me
this nappyheaded somebody
who this i dont wanna be
so i cut up my face
‘cause it there on you
do thangs a whole lot worst
i done learned how to
trying to hide in here
away in here where the sorrow
so busy duckin in behind
this each’n’every day
that i got no time to care
‘bout what here coming in the ‘morrow
slow fire it burning here
inside this withering womb
slow fire it burning in here
here inside this withering womb
the smoke it clear ‘fore my eyes
and the stink coming from it
in its smell is consumed
slow fire it burning here
inside this withering womb
slow fire it burning in here
here inside this withering womb
the smoke it clear ‘fore my eyes
and the stink coming from it
in its smell is consumed
i seeing naked little boys
laying raped
here in the belly
of somebody’s jail
slow fire it burning in here
and little bitty girls
with dry baggy breasts
nursing from they babies
for so to feed they newborn
here inside this withering womb
i hearing the choking silence
of swallowing cries
and the dissipating bellowing
of lost kinship ties
the smoke it clear ‘fore my eyes
and the hungry droning
of fat green blow flies
and the stink coming from it
in its smell is consumed
reaching hands they begging
grabbing on from everywhere
and i still never warm
they caint none of’em hold me
‘cause they got no arms
so i just keep on rolling
on up on into myself
all alone here inside
pulling here
down here
over me
holding on to me
just holding on to me
holding on to me
Lord i just wont let me be
i keep holding on to me
just holding on to me
i keep holding on to me
Lord i just caint let me be
holding on to me
just holding on to me
holding on to me
‘cause i’m holding on to me
holding on to me
just holding on to me
holding on to me
just ‘cause i’m holding on to me
so i just go on by me scheming
‘cause aint no use of me dreaming
here inside where it seeming
there’s nothing much more
than just to keep on seeming
holding on to me
just holding on to me
it like somebody’s in here
who this i aint who i be
apart of somebody else
i just caint tell who is me
so i stick out my arms
and grab what all that i see
holding on to me
just holding on to me
just oughta run away off
to where i too scared to go
but since i wont take a chance
i just gone stay here’n’dance
and keep on talking real fast
it make it all disappear
rhyming the ends
and making pretend
there aint nothing else
i much more better right here
and i dont care ‘bout what i doing
i strutt’n here for myself
got my my mouth mixing words
just like it all i got left
doom!DOOOOM!
DOOOM BA DOOM BA DOOOM DOOM
doom!DOOOOM!
DOOOM BA DOOM BA DOOOM DOOM
doom!DOOOOM!
DOOOM BA DOOM BA DOOOM DOOM
doom!DOOOOM!
DOOOM BA DOOM BA DOOOM DOOM
doom!DOOOOM!
DOOOM BA DOOM BA DOOOM DOOM
slow humping here in this sound
while i this somebody else
and this hole
still getting more deeper
it drinking all the water left
in them rivers it been said
that i’ve known
it right down here inside me
swallowing up
any light that i shown
the lord who that what i praise
in here standing here just like me
with they eyes closed looking
for just to see who they see
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee
what this i doing to me
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee
what this i doing to me
‘cause if i wont never let me seeee
who this i aint is all i ever be
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee
what this i doing to me
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee
what this i doing to me
‘cause if i wont never let me seeee
who this i aint is all i ever be
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee
what this i doing to me
SHUPE SHO-BE-DO-BE-DO
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee
what this i doing to me
SHO-BE-DO-BE-SHO-BE-DO-BE-DO
‘cause if i wont never let me seeee
who this i aint is all i ever be
DO-BE-DOOO-DO-BE-DO-BE-DO
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee
what this i doing to me
SHUPE SHO-BE-DO-BE-DO
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee
what this i doing to me
SHO-BE-DO-BE-SHO-BE-DO-BE-DO
‘cause if i wont never let me seeee
who this i aint is all i ever be
DO-BE-DOOO-DO-BE-DO-BE-DO
why wont i never seeeeeeeeeeee

Copyright © 1995 Asili Ya Nadhiri

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