in the dark this where . . . (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

in the dark
this where the hardest place
for somebody to be trying to be hiding

and so i keep on here
like this i is everyday
where there aint nobody in here
nowhere doing nothing
but leaning all up on against one another
and everybody here they always looking
just like they always here falling down
but this pussy in here
s’posed to be it so good!
it coming there in your head
from something down in the bone
caint let you leave us alone
so with a pass in your hands
this here where you come
quick sucking on the titty
and us
we here pimping the charm
on the edge doing things
so when the light never on
and then be talking in the morning
when us sleep in the jail
‘bout how the welfare it
who gone post the bail
‘til sundown come and the midnight sun
when we let outside on inside here
so we can keep on all
keep on gitting us some

tha -inged-ing -duh-ing (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

tha -inged-ing -duh-ing

in a grand mastu-r-bation
we all us all con-trivialating in ethnicized configurations
that “it’s just all about me”
pander’n pandered hip-notic panderers
pump’n like this all that real
. . . but the coffle-linged eyes en-still-ing
they still betraying us all
the prancing stones we marched on
in a hummed-drummed marching

and every body hustling shuffled on in the hustling
knowing that we knowing that we knowing we all whores
rehearsing for the selling in the sale sold selling
drivelling mouths scrolling fast our consensual snide
in farting words trolling out some big protuberating ass
propagating this numbing perver-se-nation-ning om

swallowing all and we all swallowed-up in the swallowing
he-s down-lowing him-s just like the same as with her she-s
rainbowed feeling-s ‘round in them-ed shadows
trying to pawn forbidden things
painful gnawing coalitions of this unknowing retard

we all us all we every thing-ing
just trying to come back here inside
and always through an other
that’s this some nother body self-ing

wandering here in this dark . . . (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

wandering here in this dark
where it eating up the light
(for Ralph Ellison)

i hear no words
but these that mine
mouths open they wide
they make no sound
where my hands is they bound
i cannot find
in the bottles and cans
throwd here on the ground

who’s in this bag
what i totes for me
how come me when they cut
they always see
something bleeding in here
that it never is me
aint i this shadow i supposed to be
dear god can you ever gone deliver me!
from inside here
where i’m supposed to be

Rolanda Mae, Girl! (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

https://nadhiriwrites.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/rolanda-mae-girl.wav

Rolanda Mae, Girl!

I’say
pur’ty Black Woman
pur’ty Black Woman
do’like’you want
but I know
purrr’ty Black Woman
purrr’ty Black Woman
do like’you want
but I know

git one on’me now
I’gits two on’ya den
sasssy young thang
proud as’ah hen
do like’you want
do like’you want
do like’you want
but I know
purrr’ty Black Woman
purrr’ty Black Woman
do like’you want
but I know

ground too high
n’da sky too lo’
one too fast
da ud’n too slo’
do like’you want
do like’you want
do like’you want
but I know
purrr’ty Black Woman
purrr’ty Black Woman
do like’you want
but I know

yo’ heart it wide
let’yo’ feet grow deep
n’tha’dance you is
should be yo’ keep
do like’you want
do like’you want
do like’you want
but I know
purrr’ty Black Woman
purrr’ty Black Woman
do like’you want
but I know . . .
do like’you want
but I know . . .
do like’you want
but I know . . .

en-swallowing (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

en-swallowing

in the morning
and here we is
already standing out here
talking ’bout how
what it is dat’us all gone be doing
when just as soon
as us getting back out here
in the morning

em-bitteringed (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

em-bitteringed
(counting en-timed)

you here acting like you hid when you standing wide out in the open
there ‘hind them long painted fingers you covering over your eyes
in here looking at yourself peeping out there from in between

short nibbling hair it greying scared you just clinging on
to stiff slippery ends of those desperate pretensions
cussing at somebody ‘cause it aint’a’nuff to weave

memories you worn still dress’n for wearing
with your slip hanging down surrendering
notions of a you forgot it was never is so

grab’n onto the tail of whatever words
in’a rhythmic loud hypnotic droning
masturbate’n ina swoon’n humdrum

wrap’n up in how it would’ve been
and how it now is no longer then
flailling inside a-lone-n renown
chewing on this edge of everyday
you amen-ing it quiet-ly-ing on down
powder’n the frown ‘fo your face on it seen
strutting in little lines ‘and still smiling on time

grounding me down (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

grounding me down

look at me in here
at this i doing right now
i’m waiting here inside
for something else it appear
and gone seem like it near
to this make believe
what playing here in my ear
i running back and forth
when there’s no what for
staring there inside
every go by passing car
just parade’n here strutt’n
so ’cause you then seeing me
all by myself wrapped up
in how i making like it be
cocking my head
it looking side to side
hypnotizing what i realizing
so this here that i show
be what i say to claim
that it all i have to know
and all i have to b’lieve
i ever gone need
and so long as everything
seem like i make it seem
it like i make it be
so like it really so

it like i make it seem
just like it really so

corners (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

corners

the softly stabbing sadness
of long worried nights
laying here waiting across my face
and the memories i swallow then yesterday
is what i lean up against
here in my head
these things they stay with me
this how i know i aint dead

when things i do they shackle me
my blood it pourd so endlessly
and this air so thick
it smothering me
is what i lean up against
here in my head
these things they stay with me
this how i know i aint dead

notions of you
that i’m too scared to dare
my other little thoughts
they going no where
and the nipples of things
that i wish they could be
is what i lean up against
here in my head
these things they stay with me
this how i know i aint dead

oracular (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

oracular

only the smell is raising up
from the deep tribal markings
on the dark bodies laying there
in they kin folk bowels
shackled down to the bottom
on this cold damp floor
in the belly of Jonah’s slave whales
!and we was told they was coming!
was told long long before
eating things for living they cannot name
scared about the night it filling they head
they listening for the drumming off yonder
low going lower it fading away fast
they left naked there humming
humming here alone
in the loud throbbing silence
resounding there
in the undulating rhythm of the ocean’s roar
a mama crying there gnawing on she baby throat
so he never! gone die here no more
they have to feed them ones
they burdened there my Lord to carry on
and sown here in this dirt
by many other hands
like it done been told
it was long meant to be

a-bet-ty-ing-d (a tonal drawing written in poetic form)

a-bet-ty-ing-d (a tonal drawing written in poetic form).